Antidote - - - Chapter 6

Chapter 6: He couldn’t help but ask, “Is your waist that thick?”

Cheng Ke watched Jiang Yuduo get up and then leave. Chen Qing followed soon afterwards. Just when Cheng Ke was about to breathe a sigh of relief, Chen Qing yanked hard on the door and the bang startled Cheng Ke so much he almost fell out of his chair. He sat there for quite a while before recovering his wits.

To be fair, he hadn’t been wholly unprepared for Chen Qing’s dramatic exit. He could tell it was going to be loud just from the way Chen Qing strutted out the door. Cheng Ke didn’t know why he reacted the way he did.

Maybe it was because he felt insecure.

A shell, no matter what it looked like, was a shell. If you lose it, you lose even the pretence of security.

Ever since the day Cheng Ke heard the phrase “security”, he knew he lacked it.

Absolutely lacked it.

Especially when he had to confront something, no matter what he needed to front.

When he left home, all he had were the clothes on his back. He wasn’t thinking when he up and left, just that he felt suffocated and couldn’t breathe. At the time, walking out was more important than anything.

His thought process had been simple: get out, find a place to crash for a few days, and then figure out things as they come…

But before he could get himself situated, everything came rushing at him, some so unexpectedly that he felt lost trying to juggle all the balls.

Since his childhood, the biggest crisis he had faced were fights with Cheng Yi. And even those, he screwed up handling. Not only did Cheng Yi bloody his head, he also ratted Cheng Ke out to their father. Cheng Ke had been so angry he kicked Cheng Yi right in front of their father, causing his father to chase him from the second floor to their garden, threatening violence.

… What an idiot.

Cheng Ke stood up and walked to the door where he peeked out from the spy hole.

He found the hallway empty, so he opened the door.

The keys that Jiang Yuduo handed him were cute, with a keychain the shape of a cat’s head. He took out the keys and tried the lock, opening and locking the door, and then shutting the door completely.

He held the keys for a long time, trying to think of where to put it. He had no memories of ever having keys since his home hadn’t needed keys, his room hadn’t needed keys, and everyone knocked before entering any door. All of their cabinets and chests had no need for keys.

In the end, Cheng Ke tossed the keys into his pocket. He had to go back to Xu Ding’s place, return those keys to the concierge, and then haul over the things he bought.

He wanted to give up when he saw just how much he had bought.

He leaned against the bathroom door, stared at the items on the shelves, and wondered how he ever hauled everything back the other day.

But after a few minutes of staring, he grabbed a tote and stuffed everything in it. He didn’t really have any luggage, just a few pieces of clothing he had just purchased.

The absence of things would deepen his sense of being alone in the world, so he needed some luggage.

In the end, he lumbered out the door, his hands filled with several heavy bags. He didn’t know whether he felt any better, but he could confidently say his fingers ached from the weight of the bags.

He returned the keys to the concierge with the bags, walked out of the neighbourhood with the bags, and stood by the road waiting for a taxi with the bags. After five minutes of failing to find one, he started to regret the decision and thought about leaving the things by the road.

A taxi drove by. Just as Cheng Ke was about to raise his hand to hail it, the two girls standing next to him looked up from their phone and read out the license plate.

“Yup, it’s this one.”

Cheng Ke watched them get into the car and then continued staring as the car drove off.

Ah, you can call a damn car using your phone.

Cheng Ke took out his phone. He has never used these lift-sharing apps before since he had no need for them. Frankly, he rarely even used the pay by phone function.

He randomly chose a lift-sharing app and figured out how to use it. Just as he was about to request a ride, an empty taxicab drove right past him.

Maybe it was because he didn’t seem like the type to hail a cab, but the driver didn’t even slow down to see whether he needed a ride.

Cheng Ke watched the disappearing car and said with every emotion he could muster, “Fuck.”

The app signalled that someone has accepted his request and as Cheng Ke waited for his ride, he silently prayed that no other cars would pass by. Perhaps his bad luck was leaving him because no other cars passed by up until the map showed his ride turning the corner.

A black Volvo stopped past him and he moved a bit to the side. The car honked and the driver rolled down the window.

“Is it you?” The driver called out to him.

“What?” Cheng Ke stared at the driver.

“Did you call for a ride?” The driver asked.

Cheng Ke paused, “But I asked for a taxi.”

“You requested a fast ride,” the driver explained, “check the model and license plate.”

“…Oh.” Cheng Ke looked down at his phone and saw the model and license plate number.

When he stepped into the car, the driver smiled and asked, “You’re not familiar with this, are you?”

Cheng Ke answered honestly, “I’ve never used this before.”

“Really?” The driver asked in surprise. “This is so convenient that it’s rare to find a young person not using it.”

“I’m probably not a young person then.” Cheng Ke answered.

He suddenly felt a sense of discomfort as he stood in front of the door, trying to dig for the keys while holding on to the really heavy bags. He stared at the locks, hesitated, and then put his ear up to the door.

He had always felt that Jiang Yuduo wasn’t entirely right in the head. And now he’s living in an apartment that Jiang Yuduo had the keys to and one that he can’t change the locks of. He worried that he’d push open the door to find Jiang Yuduo sitting on the sofa with the head honour guard next to him.

It was quiet inside and Cheng Ke couldn’t really hear anything. He laughed a bit at about how foolish he was, but he still carefully glanced around as he opened the door before entering. Then he locked the door from the inside.

Cheng Ke tossed the things he was holding onto the ground and collapsed onto the sofa, closing his eyes and exhaling.

He didn’t know how long he laid there. He only got up when he felt his back go numb. Glancing at the time, he realized he must have fallen asleep since it’s been two hours since he came back.

He was hungry.

Cheng Ke stood up and walked around in the kitchen. There were utensils but he had no idea if everything he needed was there. He put away his purchases in the bathroom. In just a few moments, the shelves were filled and looking like a scene from a supermarket.

He stared at them for a while before taking the stuff down and putting them away in the cabinet.

A sudden sense of frustration burst through Cheng Ke as he came out from the bedroom and into the living room.

He was very annoyed.

He had believed that renting a house, getting the keys and moving in would be all that he had to worry about.

Now he realized he had to go buy pillows, bed sheets, comforter covers and he couldn’t change shoes inside his home because there were no slippers…

Cheng Ke screamed in frustration while throwing himself hard into the sofa. Then he kicked violently at the sofa arms and shouted, “So damned frustrating!”

“This rice condiment tastes good,” Chen Qing picked up a bottle and put it into the shopping cart. “There are meat bits inside, big pieces too.”

“Why don’t you buy meat if you want to eat meat?” Jiang Yuduo asked. “All the meat pieces in the rice condiment probably don’t even add up to a single bite.”

“Just about.” Cheng Qing responded, “I don’t have a big bite.”

“I refuse to talk to you.” Jiang Yuduo said, “Please go home and eat dinner, I beg you.”

“My aunt is at my place. I don’t want to go back. It’s really annoying.” Chen Qing frowned. “Every time she’s unhappy she comes over and nitpicks at us and I have no idea where she got that habit from.”

Jiang Yuduo remarked, “I don’t think you’ve ever been in a good mood.”

“There’s cat food over there,” Chen Qing pointed, “buy some for the kitten?”

“It eats my food.” Jiang Yuduo said.

“If there’s cat food why would it eat human food?” Chen Qing asked.

“If I don’t buy any, then there won’t be any and it’ll eat human food.” Jiang Yudou looked at him. “I just picked up a stray, no way am I buying cat food. It used to eat trash.”

“But you bought cans for it.” Chen Qing said.

“You,” Jiang Yuduo pointed at him and directed, “go line up.”

“Fine.” Chen Qing nodded, turned around and headed off.

Jiang Yuduo pushed the cart towards the shelves with milk powder. He heard somewhere that cats have to drink goat milk since cow milk will cause diarrhoea and eventual death.

“Eff, this is expensive.” He stared at the various types of milk powder on the shelves for a long time before grabbing two packs of goat milk powder and putting them in the cart.

The aisle between the shelves was narrow. He dragged the car behind him as he walked towards the end of the aisle and grabbed a bag of baby milk powder. He had no idea why he bought them, he just had a sudden feeling that it would taste delicious.

Just as he backed out from the aisle, Jiang Yuduo bumped into something before he could turn around.

“Excuse me.” He said.

The person behind him stayed silent.

Can’t the person at least say “no problem”?

Jiang Yuduo, someone who normally didn’t have manners, had actually been polite this once. But it was to someone who wouldn’t respond!

What manners!

He turned around and glared.

Mr. Jaeger.

No, Cheng Ke.

Cheng Ke stood behind him with a basket in one had. His expression could be anything ranging from shock, frustration, reluctance, to dislike.

“Don’t you know how to say no problem?” Jiang Yuduo glared at him.

Cheng Ke kept looking at him and the complex array of expression finally settled on shock. After a few seconds, he replied, “Fuck no problem. You bumped into my wound. Be grateful I’m not beating the crap out of you.”

Jiang Yuduo looked at his waist. That was a surprise.

He thought he had pretty good control that day and the knife should have only pierced through the clothing and not into Cheng Ke’s body. He was wounded?

He couldn’t help asking, “is your waist that thick?”

“What…” Cheng Ke was confused at first, and then he turned around as if he lost interest in the conversation.

“There are carts,” Jiang Yuduo looked at the basket stuffed with things, “why are you using a basket?”

A cart would make it hard to follow someone.

Cheng Ke turned around and walked back to him. He stared at Jiang Yuduo and then asked, “you got a pen and paper?”

Jiang Yuduo answered, “yeah.”

“Give me.” Cheng Ke followed.

Jiang Yuduo squinted and then dug out a ballpoint pen and a piece of cigarette carton paper.

Cheng Ke took them and then bent down to write three characters before handing the pen and paper back to Jiang Yuduo.

Risperdal.

“What is this?” Jiang Yuduo asked.

Cheng Ke explained, “You can find this at the pharmacy. It’s for schizophrenia.”

“Fuck you.” Jiang Yuduo bit out.

“You wish.” Cheng Ke turned around.

The basket was heavy and Cheng Ke’s hand hurt from its weight. But Jiang Yuduo was staring at him so he couldn’t act like he was in too much pain.

It’s not that he didn’t want a cart, it’s that he didn’t see the carts. He had only seen the one lone basket by the shelves when he walked into the store.

He waited until he passed two aisles before dropping the basket on the ground and muttering, “Fuck it.”

It was too damned heavy.

He looked over and saw a young girl wearing the supermarket staff outfit shelving a cartful of inventory.

“Are you shelving everything?” He asked.

The young girl answered in the affirmative.

He asked again, “Could I use the cart?”

“Ah?” The young girl paused in surprise.

“I grabbed too much stuff,” he pointed at the basket, “is there a mechanism you have to press to get to the carts?”

The young girl laughed and said, “the carts are right by the door. There should be two rows of them when you come up from the elevator.”

“… is that so?” Cheng Ke suddenly felt awkward. Was he blind to not have seen them?

The young girl took the last of the inventory out and said, “Go ahead and use this.”

Cheng Ke was very moved and hurriedly put the things in his basket into the cart.

“Thank you.”

He almost couldn’t remember what he else he needed to buy. His eyes moved over all the things in the cart at least once before he remembered that he needed underwear.

He walked around the place for a long time and still couldn’t find the underwear.

This supermarket was huge, and the endless shelves seemed to be arranged in a maze-like configuration. At first, he thought the supermarket was U-shaped but then he thought it might be a square inside a square, and after a few more rounds he changed his mind and thought the place could be a concave square.

Finally, when he emerged from two shelves only to come face to face with Jiang Yuduo, he thought, this place is a giant F-U shape.

Jiang Yuduo didn’t seem surprised to see him. He looked calm and even had the audacity to prop his arm on his cart and smile at Cheng Ke.

Cheng Ke twitched his lips but couldn’t smile.

“What are you looking for?” Jiang Yuduo asked while smiling.

“Underwear.” Cheng Ke responded.

“Over there.” Jiang Yuduo pointed behind him.

Cheng Ke looked over and saw an entire wall of bras.

Jiang Yuduo probably saw the anger on his face and explained further, “Bras and underwear are usually in the same place. Don’t tell me you don’t know this?”

“Good night.” Cheng Ke tossed out these words and stalked off with his cart.

Jiang Yuduo turned around to look at Cheng Ke and started to doubt his own judgment.

Though a lot of hard to explain things happened from the moment Cheng Ke appeared till now, he really couldn’t connect someone like Cheng Ke with those other people.

If Cheng Ke really was a problem, then he was out the ordinary and a fresh and unique approach.

As Cheng Ke disappeared between the shelves, Jiang Yuduo sighed and pushed the cart towards the check-out counter. He could see Chen Qing waving at him from a distance.

“You are so slow.” Chen Qing remarked. “I’ve let enough people by to form a soccer team.”

Jiang Yuduo retorted, “I have to be picky you know. These are food items. I have a sense of taste, unlike you.”

“I do have a sense of taste,” Chen Qing pulled the cart over and pushed it up to the counter. “My sense of taste is just underdeveloped. Or more simply, I’m not as picky as you.”

Jiang Yuduo handed over his wallet and walked out of the supermarket, saying, “I’ll wait for you outside.”

It was getting dark earlier now. Though it was just at the end of the business day, lights were flickering on outside. Jiang Yuduo stuck a hand into his pockets and dug for his cigarettes while scanning the crowd.

He disliked nights, overcast days, foggy days, or any space without enough light.

They made him afraid.

Even though there are countless individuals walking past him right now, talking, laughing, and children crying, and couples fighting across the street. People were everywhere as far as the eye could see.

He was still afraid.

Because no matter how many people were here, nobody was looking at him. He could pull down his zippers and piss on the street and there might only be a handful of people who saw that. And by the time he finished pissing, they would have moved on.

Jiang Yuduo lit a cigarette and stuck it into his mouth. As he put the carton back, he touched the piece of hard paper that Cheng Ke wrote on. He took it out and looked at it.

Risperdal.

Screw it.

He lit the paper on fire with his lighter and watched as those three beautifully written characters twisted and then disappeared among the flames.

How did you even pronounce the last character?

Chen Qing called out, “Third Bro, let’s go.”

Jiang Yuduo snuffed out the cigarette and turned around to see Chen Qing walk over with two bags.

“This much.” He grabbed a bag, felt its weight and then grabbed the other one. He compared the two, felt the first one was lighter, and then handed the heavier one back to Chen Qing.

“Can you be less obvious about this, Third Bro?” Chen Qing looked at him.

“You didn’t drive and is going to make me cook for you,” Jiang Yuduo said. “I’m already violating my principles by carrying one bag for you.”

“Oh, that’s right!” Chen Qing exclaimed with excitement as he walked, “Do you know who I saw as I was paying?”

“I know.”

“Mr Jaeger!” Chen Qing continued. “I saw Mr Jaeger! Can you believe it?”

Jiang Yuduo only stayed quiet as he stared at Chen Qing.

“Oh,” Chen Qing paused, “you said you know. How’d you know?”

“Because you fucking,” Jiang Yuduo shouted quietly and kicked at Chen Qing’s foot, which was conveniently right in front of him, “you get so fucking excited every time you see him! Are you in damned love with him?”

“Ah!” Chen Qing jumped to the side, “Don’t break my leg!”

“Also,” Jiang Yuduo pointed at him, “don’t call him Mr Jaeger.”

“Why?” Chen Qing asked. “I don’t call him that to his face.”

Jiang Yuduo slapped him on the back. “Because I’m afraid I’ll goddamn start calling him Mr Jaeger if I hear it too often.”

“… Oh.” Chen Qing nodded, thought about it, and then moved closer to ask. “Third Bro, I’m still confused. Why can’t we call him Mr Jaeger? It’s just a nickname. We call Doggy by his nickname!”

“It’s embarrassing.” Jiang Yuduo explained.

Chen Qing stayed silent for a long time and just as Jiang Yuduo was about to forget what they talked about, he slapped his leg and said, “I got it. If we call him Mr Jaeger it’s like we’ve never touched money before, right? It’s like all we remember is his expensive watch.”

Jiang Yuduo held his breath and then released it slowly.

Chen Qing continued, “but you don’t have a watch worth tens of thousands.”

Jiang Yuduo turned around and Chen Qing hastily raised his hands to protect his head.

“Fuck all your ancestors.” Jiang Yuduo laughed in exasperation. “Did I kick the chair from under you when you hung yourself in the past life?”

Jiang Yuduo didn’t like being in the kitchen because it was small and he felt crowded. It’s why whenever Chen Qing came over for a meal, Jiang Yuduo sat in the living room waiting to be fed even though Chen Qing’s ability to cook was an insult to food.

“Third Bro!” Chen Qing yelled from the kitchen, “how about sweet and sour ribs?”

“Whatever, as long as it’s cooked.” Jiang Yuduo was examining the contract in his hand. In addition to the contract there was also a copy of Cheng Ke’s personal ID.

“Don’t expect too much of the ribs.”

Cheng Ke’s name really was Cheng Ke. Jiang Yuduo looked at the date of birth and did some mental math for his age.

Fuck me.

He was already 27.

Didn’t look like it.

Jiang Yuduo flicked the photo of Cheng Ke with his finger. Any of the seventeen-year-old kids around here would have better survival skills than this rich kid.

At least they wouldn’t have a problem finding underwear in the supermarket.

The scent of peppers came from outside the window and Jiang Yuduo coughed from it. He stood up to close the window but thought he saw someone was outside just as he turned around.

He didn’t move the curtains. The lights were off in the living room and they couldn’t see his shadow from the outside. He tilted his head so he could peek out from the gap between the curtains.

A shadowy figured quickly dashed back into the alleyway between the two buildings across the street and then disappeared.

Jiang Yuduo frowned, sat back down on the sofa, and turned on the TV.

“Done, ready to eat.” Chen Qing brought out a pot of soup and put it on the table.

“Stay over tonight.” Jiang Yuduo said.

“En?” Chen Qing looked at him and then immediately went to stand by the window to look outside. “You saw someone?”

“Not sure.” Jiang Yuduo said.

Chen Qing took out his phone, “then I’ll hang around. Let me call a couple of people and have them stand guard outside.”

Jiang Yuduo pressed a finger into his forehead. “Why don’t you hang a banner on the window that says ‘we’ve seen you’?”

Chen Qing stopped and put the phone back in his pocket. “Screw you, when will you ever talk nicely with me?”

“When will you make some room in your brain for some smarts?” Jiang Yuduo retorted as he walked back into the kitchen and took out the food that Chen Qing tortured.

“Third Bro,” Chen Qing sat down, “I have a not-quite-developed plan.”

“Then tell me when you’ve developed it.” Jiang Yuduo remarked.

“If you suspect Mr Jaeger,” Chen Qing suggested, “We still have the keys. We can totally go in and check it out when he’s away.”

Jiang Yuduo looked at him in silence.

“What do you think?” Chen Qing asked.

“Don’t call him Mr Jaeger,” was all that Jiang Yuduo said.

“…Oh.” Chen Qing nodded.

解药

(Antidote)

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